Summer Love 101: Making The First Move

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Summer love is in the air which means the singles are coming out to play. The most common place single women go this time of year to meet guys is in the nightlife setting. We all know how it goes when you meet a guy at a bar, lounge, club or some type of nightlife setting.  Most of the time one of you, or both, have had a couple of drinks, and you now have that "liquid courage" which helps you spark up a conversation. While conversing, you notice the physical attraction so you exchange numbers. Now what? What happens next? The dating scene is already hard enough and then you have to deal with the "awkward wait" after the first initial move has been made. Meeting a new guy could either be nerve wrecking or exciting. We all want it to be exciting. If your plan is to meet new "friends" this summer and need a little advice on the "first move", I am here to save the day.

First, I want to share my theory of dating. I’ve always lived by the motto "if there is something you want go after it." Never be ashamed or afraid of making the first move. You can approach a guy without looking pressed. Come on ladies, it is 2015! Clearly, I’m not shy when it comes to approaching men. That even goes if I know the guy may not be for me. It shows that you are interested.

Now, if you meet a guy in a social setting and conversation starts to flow, and he’s cute (which is always a plus), don’t be afraid to ask him for his number. There is no rule that says you can’t do it and no you won’t look aggressive or for lack of better words "thirsty". If anything, you will actually look like an established woman who knows what she wants.

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So you exchange numbers and the hard part is out of the way, but now you think about who is going to contact who first? Nobody wants to text the other person first because of the fear of looking “pressed.” I always go with the 24 hour rule. Basically, you wait at least 24 hours after the first initial meeting until you contact him.

Nowadays, young guys don’t like talking on the phone which makes things even harder because it puts a brick wall in the way of getting to know him and it’s difficult because you can’t feel the other person emotions. Best advice is to take things slow, go with the flow, and let things gradually progress. Of course, if the guy you meet is a big "texter", encourage him to have a real conversation. As him if he has time to talk on the phone or even perhaps facetime (if he has an iPhone of course). These are ways that help you get to know him better and find out if he holds the qualities you’re looking for in a mate.

After talking for a few weeks it’s only natural to be ready to see him, but he hasn’t asked you out on a date yet. If this is someone you like and want to pursue, you should casually bring up the idea of going out. Now be aware of the possible outcomes because there are always pros and cons to every situation. The pro is if he’s into you, then it will lead into your first date and it will give you a chance to know him better through in person interaction. The con is he may not be that into you and can reject the idea of going out with you.

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This is the hard part about dating, but the fear of rejection is just that... a fear. Don’t let that hold you back. Cliché, but yes, there are plenty of fish in the sea girl. If one does not bite, fish for more!

It's sundress season and you know guys love sundresses, so there will be tons of opportunities to meet guys so if you hit it off with one then enjoy or if you don’t hit it off, then get back on the prowl and keep your options open.

Summer Love is in the air and waiting for you to be caught all the way in it!

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Happy Dating :-)

Xoxo,

China

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