Girl Talk: Is It Wrong To Depend On A Man For Financial Support If He Is Not Your Husband?

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Girl Talk is where we give you guys an opportunity submit a topic, or question, and we chat about it like the girlfriends that we are. WE WILL NEVER EXPOSE YOU. Discretion is a top priority.

Topics can range from social life, relationships, finances, love, sex and the list goes on. Today, we will be discussing a very interesting yet controversial subject.  Is it wrong to depend on a man for financial support if he is not your husband?

HERE IS THE QUESTION...

"I'm talking to this guy and we have a pretty good relationship so far. He has voiced to me that I have his support if I need it. We never discussed financial support, but he is in a financial situation where he can afford to help me out with some of my bills. I have been thinking about going back to school and I could really use help with my finances. Is it wrong to depend on a man for financial support if his is not my husband?"

-Anonymous

HEre is what we have to say...

Great question. Let's start here - not your husband. That is the key phrase. We all know that if you are married, your husband is legally obligated to help financially support you if the situation occurred. But you are just dating, and it doesn't seem very serious yet, so what should you do? 

Personally, Erica speaking, I definitely do not think it is morally wrong, but I think it all depends on the situation. I do believe every women should have her own and bring something to the table, BUT there are exceptional circumstances. If you were pursuing something positive, you mentioned school, and just needed help here and there, I do not see an issue. It is not like you are just outright gold digging and stripping the man of all his riches.

Just always consider the risks.

Being that this man is not legally obligated to give you a dime he can one day just cut you off financially. If you are depending on his financial support, you just put yourself in a tight and sticky situation. 

Also, depending upon what type of man he is, he may feel as though he can control certain things in your life. Example: if you make him upset then he may threaten to stop giving you money or ask for you to give it back. He may also try to control some of your life decisions if you give him that power to financially support you. I would hate for him to feel like he has power over you.

Hopefully, he is a good man and you do not have to worry about that. 

My advice is to try to avoid financially depending on a man that you are not married to - by any means necessary. Sometimes you don't have that choice, and I understand that. Try to find other solutions before you start depending on his pockets because he is not obligated to give you anything. The last thing you want to do is put yourself in a position that can possibly backfire or leave you struggling even more later on. Accept his gifts and money if he chooses to give it to you, but do not depend on it or make major life decisions (bills, housing, legal obligations, school) around his finances.

But that is just my opinion!


Ladies, what are your opinions? Do you think it is wrong to financially depend or want to financially depend on a man who is not your husband? Leave your answers below!

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Until Next Time,

Erica S.